Un-Merry Christmas

T'was the night before Christmas when I heard an unsettling noise coming from my living room. I cautiously crept out of the comfort my king size bed, grabbed my Texas sized shot gun out of my 18th century, hand crafted wooden armoire, and tip toed down the long, chilly corridor of my house. As I approached the living room, the sound grew louder and louder when all of a sudden, a thunderous thump echoed within the walls of my residence. A quiet shriek escaped my lips. I was armed and ready to shoot, but then, confusion clouded my mind… Could it be possible? Was it him? It was him!!! It was Santa. My eyes must have been deceiving me, or at least I thought so, but, they weren't. What was he doing… here in my house? Why was he here?? The answer to my questions were to be revealed. My gun was not gonna come down anytime soon, and I was ready to shoot this motherfucker. I was too startled and alarmed to bring my guard down. 

With a demanding, authoritative British voice which managed to channel out of my nervous being, I questioned, "Who cometh there and what are thou in search of?"

He responded with glistening, welcoming eyes, "I am Santa; I come from the North Pole, and am here to give you a gift my child."

"I'm 28 years old. What can you possibly give me? What kind of bafoonery is this?"

Somehow, I had not noticed the red bag which remained attached to his right hand; my eyes would jump between this "Santa" and that bag. 

"He could have anything in there," I thought to myself. I didn't trust him and my emotions were clearly reflected upon my expression-filled face. 

"What do you bring?" I asked assertively. "What's in that bag? You have less than a minute to make thou's intentions clear before the trigger goes off!"

"I bring exactly what you want. You've got to trust me," he said.

"What I want can't just be given; I seek not the comfort of material possessions." I asked in a defensive voice. "Do you find me so vain?"

"No, my son," he assuringly said. "I know your heart and I see what's inside. I have precisely what you've been seeking."

 "45 seconds," I said looking at the tall Mahogany chiming clock. It would soon be what appeared to be 3:33AM.

 "I offer you an experience you'll never forget; the time of your life. An opportunity to escape this third dimensional human world and see what lies beyond. I offer you emotions you've never fully experience, a deeper understanding to life, and knowledge royalty like you should know."

 "Royalty?" I asked puzzled as I stood dressed in what could be anything less than royal. I couldn't deny it, my interest was peaking. "25 seconds," I stated as I tried to think of what I should do.

 "25 seconds isn't possibly enough time to explain everything to you. The legends are true… I do exist, but I rarely make appearances," he chuckled. "However, it seems the few times I've come here to Earth, I've made quite an impact. My memory has sufficed generations. Clearly you don't trust me and quite frankly, I wouldn't trust someone who were to just fall out of the chimney of my house and claim they're Santa," he giggled.

"5 seconds" I said

"They told me you'd be difficult to convince; I have no choice. I apologize in advance," he muttered out of his white bearded mouth.

All of a sudden, his eyes changed. They no longer were welcoming, but commanding. He furiously moved his fingers in the air as if he were conducting an orchestra of people and whispered foreign words I couldn't comprehend when all of a sudden my shot gun came flying up out of my hands, the red bag he held on his right hand animated to life, and then, proceeded to completely swallow my entire body up. I was falling in to what seemed was a never ending abyss of darkness. I sank, frozen and completely in shock as I knew not of this surprise Santa brought. 

To be continued...

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